It has been reported that 61% of the general population view pornography. Among Christians, 54% watch pornography, with 22% of Christians watching pornography at least once a week. These statistics are shocking. They reveal pornography as a significant problem and show that professing Christians are not doing much better in this area than non-Christians. When it comes to pornography, I think we are clearer on it being wrong and less clear on why it is wrong and how to be free. To understand why it is wrong and how to be free, we must understand God’s perspective by looking at His Word.
But first, let’s define pornography. Pornography has been defined as “sexually explicit material designed primarily for arousal”. Pornographic material can include viewing photographs and videos, reading written material or listening to audio material.
To begin to understand why pornography is wrong, we must view it within the broader context of the Bible’s teaching on marriage. In Exodus 20:14, there is the seventh commandment, which says, “You shall not commit adultery”. This commandment provides the boundary to protect the purity of marriage. We can see clearly from God’s Word that sex outside of marriage is sin. But viewing pornography is not the same thing as sex outside of marriage, so how does pornography connect to marriage? Surely I am not committing the act of adultery if I watch pornography?
God is not only concerned about our actions, but also about our desires. In Matthew 5:27-28, Jesus says, “You have heard that it was said, ‘You shall not commit adultery.’ But I say to you that everyone who looks at a woman with lustful intent has already committed adultery with her in his heart.” Clearly, God’s not just in the business of behaviour modification, but of heart transformation. His moral standard requires that we do not in our hearts desire sex with someone who is not our spouse. Our desires, which come from our hearts, are important to God. Remembering our definition of pornography, it is clear that it does involve lustful intent, which displeases God. God reserves sex within the covenant of marriage, protecting the faithfulness and purity of marriage. All sexual desires in singleness point to marriage and all sexual desires in marriage have their fulfillment in marriage. Pornography, on the other hand, awakens arousal sinfully, selfishly and lustfully, outside of marriage. Pornography stands in direct opposition to God’s design for marriage.
What are some harmful effects of pornography? Pornography causes spiritual harm, it breaches the faithfulness of the marriage covenant, it creates damage to our personal friendships and relationships, it distorts and disorders our perspective of sex, it can lead to addiction and the presence of other sexual sins, it produces harm to our communities and cultivates a heart posture and attitude of selfishness instead of love.
Many people who succumb to pornography often do so by convincing themselves that pornography is not a sin or it’s not that bad, deceiving themselves. In Jeremiah 17:9 it says:
the heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately sick; who can understand it?”
Some examples of sinful justifications include “it’s not a real man or woman, it’s just a picture”, “No one knows about it and no one needs to know about it”, “It’s normal, everybody does it” or “I don’t have a problem with it, I only watch it once a month”. To counter these sinful and deceptive justifications, the truth is, the picture is of a real man or woman, it is committing adultery in your heart, God knows about it, your standard should not be what’s common but what’s biblical and regardless of the frequency, pornography does not please God.
For those struggling with pornography you know the damage it is causing you and it may feel to you that there is no possible way you can overcome this. The Bible promises that it is possible in Christ. In 2 Corinthians 12:9 it says, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness”. The One who has paid the penalty for your sin has also won the power over your sin. You might be wondering what practical steps or measures, empowered by the Holy Spirit, you can take to experience freedom in Christ? Some measures that are helpful are to:
- Experience godly sorrow over your sin (2 Corinthians 7:10; Psalm 51:4). There are two types of sorrow over sin. Worldly sorrow and godly sorrow. Godly sorrow is to be sad about how your sin has affected your relationship with God. Godly sorrow will lead you to real change and true repentance.
- Pursue accountability from others (Galatians 6:1-2). Freedom from pornography simply won’t be possible without openness and accountability.
- Implement wise radical measures to restrict access to pornography (Matthew 5:29). If you are serious, you will take radical steps such as installing internet filtering software.
- Make confession to God and relevant others (Proverbs 28:13). Shame keeps you wanting to hide but mercy is on the other side of confession.
- Properly steward the gift of your spouse or your singleness (Proverbs 5). If you are married, God wants you to focus away from the dangers of pornography and towards the delight and protection of your spouse. If you are single, your energy and devotion can be directed towards service for Christ and His church.
- Cultivate humility (James 3:16). Pornography always flows from a heart of arrogance and cannot co-exist with humility.
- Practice gratitude (Ephesians 5:3-4). Gratitude can protect against greed, which is always involved in the indulgence of pornography.
- Embrace your relationship with Jesus and consume Christ (John 6:53). While consuming pornography brings death, consuming Christ brings life. Consuming pornography offers counterfeit satisfaction, while consuming Christ through prayer and God’s Word truly satisfies.
At HBC, we have been running men’s purity groups for the last 6 years. If you would like to finally be free of pornography, men please contact Luke McDonald (lukemcdonald181@gmail.com) and women please contact Doreen Langerak (doreenlangerak@gmail.com).
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